You Who Never Arrived
by Quirky Del
Summary: Laurie returns home after being away for over two years... AU from after the proposal and onward... Chapter 7! The story is complete! Finally! .
1. Separate, in the evening

**Standard Disclaimer – I do not own Little Women, nor the characters; they are merely affectionately borrowed.**

**Author's Note – the small quote is taken from Chapter 35 Heartache...**

**Author's Note Once More – This story would be "A/U" I suppose – It's all the same up until Laurie goes away to Europe. From that point on, things are altered. He did not marry Amy and he sort of disappeared after he left heartbroken with Grandfather...**

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"_**Perhaps the same bird echoed through both of us, yesterday, separate, in the evening..." - Rilke**_

It had been over two years.

Two years, six months, four hours, millions of seconds...but who was counting?

And he was coming home. Finally.

He wasn't sure if that was good or bad. He would find out soon enough. His head bumped against the inside of the carriage as it swayed back and forth, keeping rhythm with the trotting horses guiding it. He rubbed his face tiredly with a large gloved hand, pushing a few strips of hair away from his forehead. Maybe he could avoid her.

He was returning to his grandfather's stately home, true it was next door, but that didn't mean he would have to be neighbourly. After all, he hadn't told anyone of his homecoming. His mind wandered to old times as his eyes gazed upon the brilliant white landscape blurring by him. Fond memories of snow angels and sled rides danced upon the frosty air and his chest began to clench with the sudden flood of emotions.

No matter how desperately he tried, he couldn't keep his mind from eternally swinging back to that one all encompassing thought...would she be there? And if she is, what would be his reception?

Jo always was unpredictable, in fact the one thing you could count on was not to know what to except – no, he thought harshly. There's one other thing you could always count on with Jo – she would never love him as he wanted...as he needed her to.

He listened to the clop of the horses' hoofs as they padded over the soft powder. There was a nervous knot in his stomach twisting and jabbing at him. He wondered if he had been too rash in his resolve to return, and thought about telling the driver to turn around and bring him all the way back to the train yard. He popped his head out of the rectangular window, turning his face up to address the driver when the carriage thudded to a halt as they had reached his their destination.

He dipped his head back in, taking a steadying breath before opening the door and hopping out. There it was – the March residence. He felt his throat constrict at the knowledge that Jo could quite possibly be inside that very house at this very second. His feet turned toward the path that he had trod so many times before, and he felt his left shoe leave the ground, about to go down that worn way again before he froze. He couldn't – he wouldn't...not yet, anyway.

He turned back round and went into the old Laurence estate without a second backwards glance, snapping the door shut firmly behind him.

* * *

Jo March was hungry and on a mission. Which, of course, wasn't unusual. Her nose was poking about the cupboards, slim hands pushing and prodding the boxes and sacks inside.

"What're ya doin, Miz Josephine?" Hannah tumbled in, a small pile of wood for the stove tumbling down as she bent over.

"We don't have anything that I need, wouldn't you know it? Tomorrow is Amy and Fred's first day back, and I want to have everything perfect for her!" Jo answered, though her voice was mumbled by the efforts of her fruitless search.

"I expect anythin' we have will be good enough for Miz Amy. She's not changed that much – she'll be pleased as punch just to be home, I reckon, after all that European froofroo..." were the sound words from the woman that had become as much of the family as any of the others.

"Well, I think that Amy needs a meal deserving of a grand homecoming and I intend to give it to her – well, I intend to try, at any rate. Oh, I need to run to the grocer's, I suppose. Will you tell Marmee and Father that I've run there to fetch a few things? Oh, and don't forget Meg and the boys will be here soon, too!" Jo rushed as she wobbled off her perch on the stool, narrowly escaping a scraped knee. She grabbed her coat off of the kitchen hook as she bounded out the back door.

Her fingers numbly fastened the hooks of her jacket, and she could feel her nose already reddening with the great chill nipping around. Her gaze shot to the house of her formal playmate, a curious pull drawing her attention. She continued walking and shook her head at her foolish thoughts. Her boots seemed to turn to lead as her mind skipped back to the last time she saw her Teddy...

_'He did look round, came back, put his arms about her as she stood on the step above him, and looked up at her with a face that made his short appeal eloquent and pathetic. _

_"Oh, Jo, can't you?" _

_"Teddy, dear, I wish I could!" _

_That was all, except a little pause. Then Laurie straightened himself up, said, "It's all right, never mind", and went away without another word.'_

She snapped her eyes shut at the mournful memory, kicking up tiny tufts of snow with her toes as her gait sped. Her gaze turned back once more towards the old familiar home as she neared the corner and for a split second her eyes had deceived her, tricking her into thinking she spotted the very object of her affliction through the frosty pane. She whipped her neck back, staring forward again, resolution filling her at pushing such nonsensical and ill advised fancies from her over active imagination.

* * *

"When are you going to call?"

Laurie looked up from his hunched position over the piano. "Sorry, sir – what did you ask?"

Old Mr. Laurence smiled kindly. "I inquired as to when you plan to pay call on the Marches."

Laurie stiffened before turning away, staring blankly at the sheet music before him. "I hadn't really thought on it much."

"I see," Mr. Laurence answered softly, wishing he knew how to best comfort his grandson. He knew it must be very difficult for this youth to return home and so close to the woman that had denied him. It troubled his aging heart to no end to know that there was nothing he could do to help. He had so hoped that whisking him away to Europe would help him forget – not forget, so much as lesson the affliction of that tender and aching heart. It became clear that there would be no so such concession and as the months turned into a year it came time for Mr. Laurence to return home. His grandson was not eager at the prospect, however, so he remained touring France, Germany, and England as the old man began the journey back.

He would never forget the day he first saw the Marches again upon his return, nor would he be able to ever erase the crestfallen face that Theodore's young partner in play wore with the news that he was not with him. Poor little Jo had tried so hard to take the news in stride, biting her quivering lip and avoiding any further conversation. He had bid goodnight to the family that he dearly wanted to have melded in with his own, and he had not gotten five steps from the door when Jo tumbled out behind him. She stood before him, not sure what to say, before finally asking him, "How is my Teddy doing – really and truly?" Mr. Laurence gave her a watery smile before replying, "He's nursing quite a wound, I'm afraid...but he's young and strong. Try not to fret too much..."

Mr. Laurence was brought back from his memories as Laurie's long fingers hit the black and white keys. He looked at him protectively, wishing there was something that could be done...

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**So, this is the beginning – what do you all think? **

**Thanks for reading, and I'd absolutely adore reviews! **


	2. You who never arrived in my arms

_**"You who never arrived, in my arms, Beloved, who were lost from the start..." - Rilke**_

Mr. Laurence shut the grand front oak with a smart thud, stomping his boots on the entry way carpet. White powdery dust shook and shuddered as it fell from his clad feet, melting quickly when it hit the mat. His ears perked at the dulcet piano tones wafting toward him and it did his old heart good to hear it again. The stately home had grown so cold with the absence of it, and he felt his eyes moisten at the fond memory of the two little angels that had spun their golden music here once upon a time. His throat tickled with sadness as he remembered his granddaughter and the little girl next door that had brought her back to him, for a short time. He blinked before slowly entering the parlour, his eyes settling on the young man sitting with his back to him.

"Dear boy, why do you torture yourself so?" he asked softly as he approached him. "You've been home for a week and I've barely seen you move from this piano."

Laurie didn't look up, keeping his focus on the worn keys.

"Must you play something so dark?"

"Yes, sir, I must," was his short answer. He snapped his lids shut but his fingers didn't waver as they continued their melancholy caress. "It's my favourite...I wonder if she can hear it..." he mumbled more to himself than his grandfather.

Mr. Laurence sighed heavily. "She still doesn't know you're home, don't you think it's time?" he asked but received no answer. "You know after you left and I returned alone, she told me that she can't hear Sonata Pathetique without breaking into tears."

"Good."

The old man shook his head slowly as he stepped back out, leaving Laurie with his mournful ministrations.

* * *

"Jo! Oh, Jo – isn't it wonderful? Fred has gotten us tickets for 'The Lady and the Blade'!" Amy entered the room excitedly, her cheeks flush with the news.

Jo turned from her seat and smiled at her sister. "That's great, Amy."

Amy's grin fell. "What's the matter? I thought you would be pleased..."

Jo's mouth tugged wider in reassurance. "I am, it sounds to be a wonderful play and it was a very kind gesture."

Amy looked over her shoulder to ascertain if they were indeed alone before looking back at Jo. "Is it Fred?" she whispered.

"What? Don't be such a beetle – I love my new brother in law and always shall, as long as he continues to do right by you."

"Then what is it? You don't seem to be yourself since I've returned." Amy paused, her delicate brow furrowing. "I know things are altered now, ever since we lost dear Beth..."

"Yes," was Jo's strangled reply.

"Forgive me, Jo – you seem so lost. If there's anything that I could do to help..."

Jo reached up, grabbing Amy's hand and giving it a tight squeeze. "You being here helps tremendously!" She deposited her book on the couch and stood next to her sister, letting go of her hand and appraising her fondly. "You truly have grown up, Amy. You're so stylish and accomplished...just as you always wanted." She smiled warmly at the petite blond.

"You're...well, you're content, aren't you, Jo?"

Jo's eyes crinkled and her smile started to slide before she solidified her resolve. "Of course, I am. You're back with your new husband, happy and home. Meg and John are closeby with their brood, Marmee and Father are here for love and counsel...and sweet Beth is never far from any of us. I am blessed, so I am content."

"I can't help but wonder – if – nevermind. I don't mean to pry."

Jo waved a hand in front of her. "Pish posh – who's prying? Ask me anything, dear – ask and you shall be answered," she replied heartily.

"Do you not ever think of Laurie these days?" Amy asked tentatively.

Jo felt every muscle in her body instantly tense and stiffen. "Sometimes."

"Have you still not heard from him?"

"No...not since he left years ago. He never answered any of my letters...I know it's crazy but sometimes I think I see him or hear his voice teasing me." Jo chuckled mirthlessly. "I really am well on my way to being that 'mad March spinster', aren't I?"

Amy gave her a soothing look. "You'll see him again one day, Jo. I know it."

* * *

Laurie exhaled loudly, watching the white puffs of smoke as they escaped his lips. His frigid fingers shook as the bitter air swirled around them, scolding him for not wearing gloves. He looked to his left, then his right, scanning the area for any unwanted audience. Satisfied there was no one else, he continued his task of lifting the old post box open.

His heart twitched painfully at the vacant spot that used to be always bursting with goodies and letters. He wondered if he should be here at all, if he was even permitted entry into the once sacred alcove for their deepest secrets and silliest larks.

He sucked in a breath and pursed his lips as his free hand dug into his pocket. His fingers curled around their desired object and he grasped it tightly, as though the world would crumble if his digits faltered. He placed it into the box gingerly, his eyes darting up toward the March house before shooting back down again.

He blew a light prayer over the wrapped object before closing the lid down, sheltering it from the weather. With one last look back at the house in which he was now a stranger, he left the hedge and walked briskly away.

* * *

"Jo, dear...the queerest thing met me..." Meg entered the room carrying a small bundle, quickly seating herself at the kitchen table.

Jo glanced at her from her hunched position over the table, flour patted on her cheeks and stray hair poking about her head.

Meg continued at her inquisitive look. "I'm sure this wasn't there yesterday," she indicated to the wrapping in her hand. "You know how the children love to open our old little post office whenever we visit, and it was empty yesterday, like it always is these days," she muttered, regret tinting her voice, "but today I found this inside..."

Jo squinted her eyes at the petite parcel, as if doing so would enable her to view through the cloth. "Well, whatever is it?" she finally asked, her hands still enveloped in the forgotten dough.

"I haven't opened it, yet. I thought I would bring it in so we could see it together."

"Well, stop being such a goose and go on with it..." Jo prodded, curiousity shining through.

Meg's dainty hands made quick work of the covering, the ribbon that had bound it falling aside as the treasure was revealed. Meg held it up, examining it with a critical eye.

Jo looked on for a moment, with baited breath. She tilted her head to the side before gasping suddenly.

Meg turned sharp eyes on her. "What is it?"

"It can't be..." Jo whispered reaching out with sticky fingers. Meg released it to her and Jo brought it an inch from her nose, staring at it hard.

"Are you going to tell me what's going on?" Meg demanded again.

"It's...it's impossible." Jo finally slumped into the nearest chair, grubby hands still grasping tightly.

"Josephine March, if you continue to speak in such riddles I shall bring Marmee in to have a talk with you...and you know how she doesn't like being interrupted when Daisy and Demi are here for her to spoil!"

But Jo appeared to be in a daze, not having heard a word that was directed toward her. She sat immobile, eyes fixed on what her hands were holding. After sitting thus for another moment she slowly stood up.

"I have to find out...I have to go now."

"Where? What are you going on about, Jo? You don't have time to go anywhere right now. Amy and Fred will be here any moment to take us to the play, remember? You barely have time to change as it is!"

"But I have to know – "

"I'm sure whatever it is can hold until after the show – " she was interrupted by new voices gliding to the kitchen. Meg looked behind her before turning back round. "You see? There's Amy and Fred now. Come, I'll tear John away from Father while you go up and dress. And on the ride over you can tell me what has you all aflutter so suddenly."

"Hmm?" Jo murmured as she glided out of the kitchen, bread dough deserted in a heap on the table board.

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**Well, there's the next installment. **

**Thanks very much for reading, and I would bloody well Love a review! **

**Any ideas on what was left in the post box? Heehee, I'm a bit wicked not telling you outright, but you've got to build the suspense, wot ho?**

**I shall update soon!**

**Don't forget to review. : ) Yes?**


	3. All the gardens I have ever gazed at

**Ag, so sorry it's taken so long to update!**

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_"_**_You, Beloved, who are all the gardens I have ever gazed at, longing." _- Rilke**

Jo blinked.

Tiny ringlets of smoke clung to her lashes as she gazed upon the vacant stage. She was anxious for the play to commence, relying on the strangers to extract her worries and parry her fears away; at least temporarily. That's what she loved about fiction and stories – they were the greatest remedy for a troubled soul, pulling you up and out of your stupor of reality, daring you to take chances and question your circumstances. At the very least it offered solace and companionship if ever you found yourself floundering.

She directed her glance to the opulent ceiling, the after haze of smart cigars tickling her nostrils. She was grateful to her new brother-in-law for procuring these coveted seats for them, but she wasn't sure if she didn't prefer the seats in the back better. At least when you're amongst the poorer set you're not bombarded with the assault of the socialite men trying to outdo one another, each vying for who's got the finest cigar collection.

Her worn plum purse was clutched tightly in her hands and she couldn't stop fidgeting. Her gray eyes darted back and forth before she slowly unclasped her bag, pulling out the desired object. There it was in all it's feeble little glory – her battered old Shakespeare pocket book. The one that she hadn't seen in so long. She turned it around in her long fingers, opening the cover again, letting the words dance through her head for the tenth time that evening.

_'Jo,_

_You don't know that I've nicked this little volume from you – if you did, you'd have my head for sure! I couldn't help myself, dear fellow. Here I am, going off to college come morning without my topsy turvy right hand to accompany me! So, I thought I had better bring a small memento of yours with me – I dared not ask, I knew you'd say no in your harsh way when things get too sentimental and then have a good laugh over my foolishness after. Only, you just don't know how desperately sentimental I want to be with you, Jo dear. One day you will – one day I shall gather the courage to burst my heart to you and by the time you read this scribbling of mine you shall be my wife – I hope. Oh, don't let us down, dearest!_

_Love always,_

_Your Teddy_

Jo stared down numbly. Her thoughts went back to the day that she had first noticed her beloved volume gone – that was a dark day for her. Laurie had just left to start his new collegiate life, leaving her behind. She sought solace the best way she knew how – with her dearest fictional friends. She must have torn apart the entire garret searching for that small book that she loved so much. She was so angry with herself for misplacing it, she had no idea that Laurie was to blame for the disappearance!

Her back slouched as she furrowed her brow. The passage he had written on the cover lid kept playing in her mind over and over. She remembered that evening before he left, they had cooked a grand meal for him and afterward the two of them had snuck up to her little solace, talking until late. He must have pocketed the small book when she had run back downstairs to fetch them more lemonade.

So, the mystery of where the book had gone was now solved, but how did it reappear in the post box? Did this mean that Laurie had returned? And if he had, why had he not yet visited? These questions swam inside her as the lamps were dimmed and the stage come to life.

* * *

He couldn't stop staring.

He gazed at the face that he had once known so well, every contour, every shadow that had always eluded him – he was so close.

He felt as though icy fingers rammed down his throat, squeezing his heart with it's frigid grasp. She was there, only a half of a room and a dozen people between them. She hadn't noticed him – none of her party had, and he wanted it that way. He wanted to be able to watch her without consequence. She looked so distracted, he wondered if she had noticed the gift he had left in her post box. His question was quickly answered, however, when he saw her begin to squirm even more than she already was and open her purse.

He regarded her closely as she palmed the book and read his words inside – his words that he had written it seemed a lifetime ago. Hopeful aspirations from a naïve youth, he thought bitterly. That was when he thought he actually stood a chance – that's when he was someone else. Someone who still believed in love.

The room was thrown in near darkness as the play came to life before him, but he couldn't force himself to look away from her. He noticed out of the corner of his eye that his seat mates were looking at him, no doubt curious as to his fascination. He reluctantly twisted himself to face forward, eyes on the stage but not really seeing. He couldn't suppress his anxiety at the thought that she could notice him any minute.

Intermission was signaled, sending the entire theatre in a whirl as limbs were pushed and toes stepped on.

Jo needed a breath of fresh air to assist her in collecting her jangled thoughts. She excused herself from her family and scurried out of the front exist. The crisp night air filled her lungs and she felt some of the tension drain out of her. Small clusters formed around her, conversation flying past her ears. She ignored the gathering crowd outside, knowing she was surrounded by people but suddenly feeling utterly alone. She hadn't noticed the tall gentleman step up behind her.

"Hello, Jo."

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**Thank you very much for reading! I would be quite thrilled if you left a review, too: ) .!**

**I vow not to take so long on the next update! I'll be out of country for two weeks, but I'll add the next chapter after that!**


	4. I don't even know

**Author's Note – All I can say is sorry it's taken me so long to get back! A million thanks to all of you who have left such wonderful and flattering reviews! It gives me a wonderfully fuzzy glow!**

* * *

_**"I don't even know what songs would please you." - Rilke**_

His skin was buzzing with the nearness of her.

The intermission curtain fell and he added his distracted clap to the rest of the applause, craning his neck as his neighbours rose from their seats. He didn't want to lose sight of her, though there was little danger of that; his eyes had grown so accustomed over the years to filtering her out from any crowd, great or small. He rose from his chair as the thickening bodies obscured his view and his gait quickened as he caught a glimpse of her darting out the exit.

His nerves began to bubble and he licked his lips as he stepped into the night air. His pace slowed as he weaved between the luscious skirts and snappy coat tails, stopping to stand two feet behind her. He stared at her back while he took a breath before saying lowly, "Hello, Jo."

It couldn't be...

That thought shot through her for the split second before she whirled around to see the owner of the so familiar voice. She peered up into his dark eyes, her own orbs foggy with surprise. She suddenly launched herself at him, arms flinging around his neck.

"Oh, Teddy!" she whispered into his shoulder. "Teddy!"

"It's so good to hear you call me that," he muttered solemnly, as if part of a prayer.

His voice seemed to jolt her back to reality and she immediately stiffened and pulled away, crimson staining her cheeks. "Sorry, I didn't mean to jump at you!" She looked everywhere but at him.

"I've waited a long time for you to fly at me again."

She looked at the boy – no, man – that she had missed so terribly over the years. Her eyes scrutinized over any changes that time had etched into him. His frame was leaner, his face had a couple of new wrinkles, but the one alteration that was most apparent was his eyes...they still held that irrepressible sparkle of mischief but there was an underlying murkiness that she knew she was the cause of. She sighed in a confusing mixture of agitation, jitters, and elation.

"Where have you been?" she asked harsher than she intended.

He let out a derisive little snort. "Finding myself."

"And have you?"

His lids narrowed as he pulled his gaze away from her. "I don't know."

Silence enveloped them for a moment before Jo cleared her throat queerly. "Isn't this a lovely play?"

He returned his stare back at her, minuscule amusement shadowing the corners of his lips. "I wouldn't know – I've found myself distracted."

Her body turned molten under his intense take of her and she was desperate to fill the gaping quiet with something. "Oh, well I can assure you it is," she plowed on rigidly. "The actors are quite good and the story is...is well thought."

"You're the great writer, so I'll take your word on it."

She paused before going on, "this theatre is lovely, isn't it? Do you remember when you took Meg and I here? We had such a grand time of it then, didn't we?" she laughed nervously, "Meg and Brooke had to keep whispering to us to be still, we were having such a good lark. And you – you dreadful boy – you kept telling me those off colour jokes and making me so boiled that I finally turned to you and yelled for you to stop! Of course then you just pulled that face that always made me laugh, hill or dale. And after the play you forgot to catch me when I tried to swoon –" she broke off her anxious rambling, the memory clutching at her.

"I remember," he answered simply.

"I'm sorry at all my chatting – I guess I'm just a bit nervous..." she muttered.

He watched her bite her lip and round her shoulders, an act that he had seen many times in the past whenever she tried to put on a brave face. "Jo..." he breathed, stepping toward her.

She matched each step he took with a pace back, with arms crossed. A mass of emotions bullied around inside of her before injured distress won out. Hurt jerked from her in shocks. "Why? Why did you stay away so long from _m_– from _us_? No letter, no word at all?"

His brow darkened as he rallied for a suitable answer but he was cut short as the clustering crowds around them began to scatter, signaling the end to the intermission. He glanced around, spotting Fred and Amy off in the distance, followed by his fellow teacher, "drippy Brooke" as he used to tease, leading Meg up the stairs to the inside. He looked back down at Jo's expectant face turned up toward him.

"We should go in," Laurie said shortly. He jutted out his elbow in offering and Jo hesitated a moment before taking it. They walked into the lobby without conversation and only when they reached her aisle did either speak.

"How did you know I would be here?" she asked softly.

"I didn't."

"But you knew where I was sitting...you knew where to find me..."

"I had hoped you'd be here, but I wasn't certain. I know Fred Vaughn always had a taste for showing off his wealth, I know he likes to play at being a connoisseur of the theatre. I figured he might take you all here to show off."

"You sound bitter," Jo remarked disdainfully.

He scoffed. "Bitterness suits me better than buoyancy."

"I don't think so," she broke away from him and inched down the row quickly, leaving him standing alone.

He couldn't stand it much longer.

The play was over, it had ended without offering him the chance of speaking with her again. As soon as the story was drawn to a close he had immediately left his seat, trying to make his way through the sea of people to address her again. He was too late, however, and he only made it in time to watch the carriage take her away.

He was always too late.

He stopped pacing his parlour, instead deciding to kick the umbrella stand, sending the contents tumbling over with a thud. He picked up the mess haphazardly. No sense in taking his frustrations out on defenseless objects. No, he wanted to take it out on _her_. He threw his coat back on, not caring about propriety at the late hour. He needed to talk to her, he needed to know why she avoided meeting up with after the play, he needed some answers and he needed them now.

He let the front door slam behind him as he trudged out in the snow, his heavy boots forging a messy path. He lowered his head to the shrill and nippy wind, knowing his skin would pay for his carelessness in not wearing a hat. He peered up at the affable house, noticing a candle lit in the utmost window. He paused for only a beat before going to the old tree that he had scaled so many times, in pursuit of the room that had been backdrop to countless conversations and scenes.

His grip slipped as he finagled his way to the last sturdy branch. His fingers fumbled as his foot swung out precariously, landing in a thump on the window ledge. His eyes shot to the occupant in the room, her face clearly taken aback at the noise.

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**Thank you very much for reading! And thanks again for all those who review, it means heaps of loveliness when you do!**

**PS - I've already got the next chapter going, I've just got to finish it.**


	5. I have given up trying to recognize you

_**"I have given up trying to recognize you in the surging wave of the next moment." - Rilke**_

_His grip slipped as he finagled his way to the last sturdy branch. His fingers fumbled as his foot swung out precariously, landing in a thump on the window ledge. His eyes shot to the occupant in the room, her face clearly taken aback at the noise._

"Good heavens!" Jo cried in alarm, a hand clutched at her chest. She jumped on jelly feet, rushing to the window to fling open the pane.

"Thank you," Laurie muttered as he climbed inside, hair tousled from the exertion.

Jo stared at him silently, wondering where to begin. She watched as he brushed snow from his lapels, steadfastly avoiding her gaze. "You could have broken your neck, foolish boy!"

He looked at her, a strange feeling of familiarity seized his memory. "Guess I am out of practice."

"So am I," she breathed, pausing before turning her back to him, busying herself with the book that she had tossed at his interruption.

His brows slanted at her evasiveness. A sardonic chuckle fought it's way up his throat. "Is this the only receipt I'm to have?"

Her glowing orbs peered at him over the page. "You've changed," she commented at length. "I noticed when first I saw you this evening."

"Have I?" He leaned against the wall, his lanky limbs relaxed.

She closed her palms, letting her book snap to a close. "What part are you playing now?"

He blinked, the corners of his lips tugged upward curiously. "Are we back to our old drama romps, Jo?"

"No." Her chin tucked to her chest when she next gazed up at him. "I don't want to play with you anymore," she whispered achingly. "You play too rough."

"So do you." The yellow glow of the candles cast long shadows along his handsome face. His surliness lasted only a flicker before it was replaced with a less peevish attitude.

"Why did you come back?"

He scrutinized the thin woman before him, deciding on how much he was ready, and willing, to reveal. "Grandfather needed me."

She gave him a thin smile, toughening her outer skin. She wasn't in the right spirits to lay herself raw. Not right now. If he wasn't willing to be open, then by hardy, neither was she. "It's good to see you, old friend," she braved, "but the hour is late, so I shall bid you goodnight."

"Of course," he smarted at her wintry air. "I'm sorry to have bothered you." He bowed glacially and turned to the window, ready to once again take hold of the branch when he was stopped by one susurrus word -

"Teddy-"

He closed the space between them in two strides, took her in his arms, and crashed his lips to hers. Her lashes fluttered wildly at the unexpected gesture, but after a moment she closed her lids and felt her nerves melt into molten. His fingers tangled in her wild hair, hers wrapped around his neck, the kiss grew more impassioned. One of his hands moved to the small of her back, pressing her flush against him. They had never been this close. She felt his tongue beg for access and she granted it, not really knowing what else to do. These feelings had never flooded her before, she was unsure whether to be more frightened or ignited; for the moment it was a combination of both. He brushed his lips to her cheek, then her earlobe, down to the juncture of where shoulder meets neck. Her body leadened with all of these new sensations, she was sure she would stumble if he didn't have her so tightly tucked into his embrace. They were wading in dangerous waters until the haze was broken by her name being called from downstairs. Laurie pulled away from her, his palm cupped her cheek as he gazed into her eyes, each of them attempting to glove their masked emotions carefully – neither succeeding very well. He tore away and leapt out the window, swinging quickly to the bottom. She trotted to hang over the sill, watching him crunch in the snow and turn back round to offer a half wave before disappearing into the night. Her warm and laboured breaths frosted in the outside chill.

"Jo!" Amy opened the door to the garret and furrowed her brow. "Didn't you hear me calling for you?" She stepped inside, frowning. "You're going to catch your death letting in all of that freeze on a night like this! What are you staring at?"

"Nothing!" Jo squeaked, whirling around to face her sister.

"You look flushed – you should lay down." Amy neared her in concern.

Jo nodded absently. "I do feel a little...heated," she muttered, brushing past her blond sibling and scurrying to her room. She lay awake, thinking of the day's events, finally falling asleep with a flurrying pulse.

* * *

"JO!" A bubbly girl burst on her bed, sending the springs into overgear as she bounced. "JO! WAKE UP!"

Jo yanked the lumpy pillow from beneath her head and plopped it over her face to block out the younger girl's yelling.

"JO!"

"What?" she mumbled, reluctantly removing her feathery guard and turning her weary face to Amy.

"I saw him!" she announced her plummy secret in a teaser.

"Hmm?" Jo moved to sit up and rub the sleep from her eyes.

"Laurie, Jo! I saw Laurie! He's back – he's here!" Her giddiness rolled from her petite shoulders.

"Oh? Did you?" Jo rose a brow, cautious to conceal her lack of surprise.

Amy bit her plump lip. "Are you not glad of it?"

"Yes, of course..." she scrunched her nose, she never was one for hiding her feelings.

"Tell me, what's the matter? I thought that this news would please you?"

"It does...of course, it does." Jo wore a thin smile.

"Then why the distance, dearest?" Amy regarded her closely.

She swallowed hard, studying the bedpost. "I saw him last night – at the play."

"Why did you not tell us?" Amy demanded, affronted. "Why did he not mention it to me this morning? Fred and I strolled to the market when we ran into him on the lane. He said no such thing of your meeting last night! He acted as though...well, as though he hadn't seen you at all, yet."

Jo shrugged, pursing her lips. "It was...complicated..."

"Josephine! Miz Josephine!" Hannah waddled up the steps, stopping in her open doorway. "Miz Josephine! Look at ya, lallyin' about at this hour! And ya, wit' a visitor waitin' in the parlour!"

Jo's eyes grew like saucers. "Who, Hannah?"

Hannah's old face crinkled in a grin. "Why, Mr. Laurence, wouldn't ye know it?"

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**Thank you so much for reading! And an ENORMOUS thanks to all of you who have been kind enough to review! I hope that this chapter, after such an absence, did not disappoint! = ) So, thanks again for reading, and I would very much appreciate your feedback! I know I'm veering a little with Jo and Teddy here, but hey, that's the fun of fanfic, yeah? Hope you all have a wonderful holiday in case I'm not able to update again before that! **


	6. You, who forever elude me

**Author's Note – THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU to all of you who are reading, and a special THANK THANK YOU to everyone who has given me such kind reviews! It means a lot, and I am very grateful for all of the kind words!**

* * *

"_**You, who forever elude me..." - Rilke**_

"_Josephine! Miz Josephine!" Hannah waddled up the steps, stopping in her open doorway. "Miz Josephine! Look at ya, lallyin' about at this hour! And ya, wit' a visitor waitin' in the parlour!"_

_Jo's eyes grew like saucers. "Who, Hannah?"_

_Hannah's old face crinkled in a grin. "Why, Mr. Laurence, wouldn't ye know it?"_

Jo sat, stiff as a board, not daring to meet either of the womens eyes. "Thank you, Hannah."

"Are you alright?"

She looked to her younger sister's anxious face. "Yes, I'm just...I'm going to be dressed and down in a few moments."

"I'll just go tell the young Mr. Laurence, then," Hannah grinned at them, completely unaware of the tension in the room.

"Jo-" Amy ventured, but was waved off by her.

"I'll see you downstairs," she crossed the room briskly, and kept her back turned until she heard the door snap closed behind Amy. A large breath left her, her heart raced. She swallowed and made her way to her wardrobe, flung open the door, and gazed dejectedly at the plain dresses that met her. Finally settling on the faded purple, she began to dress with trembling fingers. Donned and ready, her feet were heavy as she entered the parlour and found Laurie still standing in the entry way.

Laurie stood a moment, just watching her. He must have read her silence as a sign of his affect on her, for an easy smirk found its way over his features. "Do I make you nervous, Jo?" He watched in amusement as her entire demeanor bristled.

"Of course not."

He leaned his long frame against the doorway. "Aren't you going to invite me in?"

She jutted her chin out, and defiantly answered, "No."

His grin grew wider. "Why not?"

"You know why," she whispered with urgency. His chuckle grated on her. "Why don't you just leave?"

"You know why," he handed her own words back to her, his dark eyes glittering.

"Heya, old chum!" Fred Vaughn waltzed into the room, his glance shot between Laurie and Jo. "Am I interrupting something?"

"No," Jo replied a little too quickly.

"What is everyone still standing in here like a flock of silly geese for?" Amy breezed by them and motioned for them to follow as she sat herself in the modest living room. Her hands joined primly in her lap and she waited for her three companions to be seated before speaking again. "Laurie, you must tell us all about your romantic adventures abroad!" She paused, wearing a wicked smile. "And, why you kept yourself away from us for so long, you wicked boy!"

Jo groaned silently, wishing to be anywhere but there. "I'm sure Laurie has better things to do than to entertain us with his misadventures."

Laurie grinned, leaning to rest his elbows on his knees. "Actually, I can't think of anywhere that I would rather be." He tilted his head towards Jo, settling an intense gaze on her.

Fred's brows lifted. "Tell me old friend, how many European hearts on a string have you dragged behind you?"

"Freddie!" Amy's voice was scandalously high. Jo's eyes were downcast.

"Oh, you know me, Fred," Laurie leaned back in the chair, "two dozen or so." His eyes found Jo's, and a smirk lifted his lips.

"Oh, I don't believe that," Amy protested. "Not our sweet Laurie, you're too good a man for that nonsense."

"I don't know, Mrs. Vaughn," Fred chuckled at his wife's wide eyes. "As I recall, Laurence here was quite the lady's man back in school." A wicked smile stretched his face. "But there was that one girl that always stood taller than the rest, eh, Theodore?"

A large swallow pushed down Jo's throat. "Let's talk about something more grounded, shall we?"

"Of course we shall," Laurie answered, a half smile turned towards her. "The only time that love concerns Jo is when it fills the plight of her characters." The jab was unmistakably sharp, and the room sat still. "She's much too practical for love to interfere with her in real life, aren't you, Josephine?"

"We're having a picnic at the lake," Amy blurted in a save for her sister. "You really must join us, Laurie. Meg and John will be there, with Daisy and Demi! You must come, really and truly!"

"I would not miss such an event for all of the tea in the world, Little Vaughn," Laurie declared grandly.

"I should start gathering things for today," Jo dismissed herself and made a swift exit to the kitchen. Relieved at having a private moment, she lulled her neck down and stared blandly out the window.

"You can't ignore me forever, Jo," Laurie's breath heated the nape of her neck. She froze, panicked that he was standing so close behind her.

"Step back," she whispered harshly.

"We're alone in here," Laurie informed her in a low tone, "I don't require your decorum."

"But I do!" She sidestepped his nearness, settling herself against a counter corner. "I'm not certain I like this new scoundrel in you."

"I am," he smarted back. "I've never seen you so alive as you are when you're next to me," he took a step closer, but made no further move. "Do you want to know what I think?"

"No."

"No need to badger it out of me, dear girl, I'll tell you," he joked, the corner of his eyes crinkled with teasing. "You're tired."

"You're full of heady notions that were best left abroad," she snapped.

"You like those notions," Laurie challenged, taking another step towards her. "That scares you...I scare you..." He was so close to her, if he bent down their noses would touch. "**You **scare you."

"Ridiculous," she murmured, getting lost again.

"Jo," he breathed, his fingers curled around her upper arm.

"I say, this is where you two stole off-" Fred's words halted along with his feet. Jo immediately flung herself away from Laurie.

"I, uh...I..." Jo stumbled her words, then rushed out of the room and up the stairs.

Fred looked at Laurie, who was still watching the corner that Jo disappeared behind. "I'm sorry, old friend. I didn't mean to-"

"It's fine," came Laurie's sunken response.

* * *

**Thank you for reading! Please review, if you have the chance! = ) .**


	7. All Rise Within Me to Mean You

**Author's Note: I'm back! Sorry, sorry it took so long! I took a much needed break to focus on uni, etc, but I'm glad to be back! Here is the ending, finally, and I am going to keep working on my other stories here within the next few weeks. I hope to really get a lot of work done on my other continuing Little Women stories, so check back soon on the others! Thanks to all of you who are reading!**

* * *

"_**All the immense images in me...all rise within me to mean you..." **_-** Rilke**

* * *

"Jo?" Amy hovered in the doorway to her sister's room. "Are you alright?"

"Of course. I'm fine." Jo stood on her toes to retrieve the old quilt from the top shelf of the wardrobe, sending the material flying down on her in a heap. Amy helped untangle the blanket.

"I saw you run upstairs," Amy started slowly. "Did Laurie say something he ought not to have said?"

Jo lifted her brows. "A little." She rolled the quilt into a large heap before tucking it under her arm. "It's nothing. Shall we go?" She walked out of the room and down the stairs before Amy could ask any more questions.

Meg, John, and their brood, along with Marmie, Mr. March, Laurie, and Fred were all waiting downstairs. Their expectant faces turned towards the two sisters as they entered the room.

"Ready?" John held up two picnic baskets.

"Have a nice time, be sure to mind the hour and the sun," Marmee told them. Mr. March grinned happily with his arm around his wife.

"I wish you two were joining us," Amy said for the third time.

"Picnics and outdoor frolicking are for the young," Mr. March said. "When you and Fred reach our age, you'll understand." He winked at Marmee, who blushed just as prettily at the age of forty-five as she did when she was twenty.

"Care to take the arm of an old friend, Jo?" Laurie grinned down at her, jutting his elbow out. She was keenly aware of the sets of eyes secured on them as she acquiesced, walking with Laurie outside. She took her arm back the moment they reached the end of the walkway. "Will you ride with me," he asked.

"Oh. Well," Jo paused, looking about for another means of transportation. Fred was helping Amy into their smart little chaise, John was assisting Meg with settling Demi and Daisy into their old carriage.

Laurie followed her line of thought, leaning close to her ear. "Looks like you're stuck with me, old girl." He grinned, the old boy shining through, before jerking his head towards the seat. "May I help you up, Ms March?"

"I'm perfectly capable of getting into that thing myself," she huffed, grabbing a fistful of skirt as she heaved her foot into the hanging step. Pulling herself up and onto the seat, she looked over the edge, blinking at the height of their mount. Laurie hopped onto the other side of the carriage, and picked up the reigns before clicking the horse to go after the first two carriages that were rolling down the lane ahead.

"What in Heaven possessed you to buy a frivolous contraption such as this?" Jo glanced up at the tasseled canopy, frowning at the silk.

Laurie's self satisfied grin widened. "Oh, this old thing?" He snorted at her sour face. "This is a Phaeton, a must for the upper set, of course."

"Don't you think your finances are better spent in other pursuits?"

Laurie stared at her a moment before turning his gaze back to the road. "I know you don't give a dickens about what type of carriage I drive. We've never been ones for pomp, Jo. Why don't you say what you're really thinking?"

"You overstep your bounds."

He tilted his head, watching her curiously. "Then why do you put up with me?"

She slanted her brows. "I don't know."

With a soft chuckle he said, "Finally, an honest answer."

* * *

The parties before them stopped their carriages at the lakeside, Laurie rounded his to the rear. He lulled the horse to a stop before turning his gaze to Jo.

"You've hardly said a word to me the entire way over. Are you going to be like this all day?"

She took a deep breath. "If you promise to behave, then I shall be a bundle of sunshine." And with that, she hopped down from the tall buggy before trotting over to the others.

John Brooke flung a few blankets into the air, Meg smoothed them as they hit the grass. Demi and Daisy made quick work of ruffling them up again as they rolled around like wild monkeys. Fred and Amy put themselves to use, spreading their confections in a very pretty row along one of the quilts. Jo snorted, rather unladylike, at the way Amy fashioned flowers she had brought with her around each container of food. Jo's laughter died when Laurie plopped himself onto the quilt quite close to her.

"It's almost like being at Camp Laurence again, isn't it?"

Jo glanced at the man beside her, looking like her Teddy for the first time since they were reunited. "Why can't you be like this all the time? Like the old Teddy, not this new darker version of you. I much prefer you as you are now, this moment."

"Do you, Jo?"

She turned from his hopeful face. "What do you want from me," she asked quietly, focusing her gaze on a scurrying ant amongst the green blades.

"Let's go for a walk." He stood, reaching one hand down. Pausing for only a second, she allowed him to take her hand and pull her up. No one noticed them slip away and into the thick of trees which flanked the clearing.

Jo lingered near a cranberry bush, fingering the small crimson berries. Her breath hitched when Laurie's fingers curled round her arm, turning her to face him.

"I don't know why I came back. Or, rather, I do, at least I have a notion," he started, pursing his lips. "I had to see you. I had to know what you were like since I last left you. I had to know you were suffering...as I was."

"Teddy, I-"

"No, let me finish." He screwed his face in concentration, tightening his hold on her arm. "You're right. I have let myself grow weary, and vexing. I've been cross with you and teasing, and been a cad, and I don't want to keep up like this."

"Then let's stop," Jo asserted, pulling out of his grasp. "We can go back to the way we once were, good chums. Forget these past few days," she cleared her throat, "and before."

Laurie's surliness returned. "Is that what you want? Really and truly?"

Jo opened her mouth before closing it again and sighing. "Yes. Of course."

A new glint filled the boy's dark eyes. "You don't. I saw it just now."

"Don't be feather-brained."

"You can deny it all you want, but there it was. I was beginning to lose my nerve, old fellow," he used the old affectation warmly. "I was nearly willing to throw in my hat, but then there it was."

"What," Jo croaked as he stepped nearer.

"The crack. The crack, Josephine March, in your armour. Oh, you've hidden it well, but I caught glimpse of it." He stalked towards her, stopping just in front of her now stiffened form. "Give in, Jo," he whispered, wrapping his arms around her waist. "Do be a good girl now, hm?" He pressed his lips to her forehead. Then he pressed them to her nose, before moving to kiss each cheek softly. "You do care, don't you?" His lips vibrated against her mouth as he said the words before taking her into a kiss. She grew wooden, his lips still massaged at hers until she finally parted them for him, returning the kiss. Twisting the sides of his jacket with her fists, she clutched so hard her knuckles paled. He pulled away, still keeping his hold on her.

"I have to know," he murmured, "if this is you making yourself love me?"

Her breathing was heavy as she attempted to calm her anxiety, his question only compounded her confusion. She shook her head, "What do you mean?"

Laurie shot a sardonic little half smile to her. "Once upon a time, not too far from this very spot, I urged you to make yourself love me." He palmed her cheek, gazing at her in earnest. "With Beth gone, I know you must grow lonely." She was about to speak, but he hastened to say, "If the answer is yes, if you are relenting to my badgering because of your lonesomeness, I understand. I just want to know where I am; with you." He explored her afflicted face with his eyes. "Because, honestly Jo, I would take you any way I can have you."

Jo stepped out of his arms, but did not take further leave of him. "I won't deny my feelings for you, Teddy. But, I don't know how much I can give; just at the moment. This is all so new."

"We'll take it slow then," he rushed, "I don't require any promises or vows. All I want is a maybe. A maybe, Jo." He cracked a grin after his prodding, a curl falling over his temple. "Will you give me a maybe?"

She could not help the smile which made it's way over her thin face. "I'll give you more than that, Teddy. I'll give you a yes and a later, if you promise to be patient."

"Excellent," he blurted, grabbing her round the waist again, this time swinging her about. Her peals of laughter matched his, but their mirth was quickly lost when he spun her a little too hard, causing her foot to hit the trunk of a nearby tree.

"Christopher Columbus," she shouted, reaching over to the injured appendage.

"Holy smoke, I'm sorry, old fellow!" Laurie bent over her, peering at the damage. "Are you alright?"

Turning her cross face upwards at him, her frown flipped back up, she couldn't help but chuckle at his concern. "Well, are you going to stand there gawking at me all day, or are you going to assist your fallen comrade?"

"Yes, sir!" Laurie reached a hand out to pull her up. She wobbled beside him back to the picnic site. They sat on the quilt, joining the others in their gay conversations. Every few minutes, Laurie and Jo would take turns exchanging smiles and warm glances with one another.

On the drive home, Laurie requested they make a stop. Grandfather Laurence was exceedingly excited to hear the news of the budding courtship between his grandson and Jo. Back at the Marches' house, not a word needed to be said, they all knew their boy had finally won Jo's heart.

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**Wow! I wasn't actually planning on this being the last chapter, but it just sort of wrote itself and it seemed time. I hope you guys liked it! I would love if you reviewed and let me know what you thought of this last chapter, and the story as a whole! Thanks to everyone for reading, and a special thanks to all of you who reviewed! = ) Reviews really make my day a bit brighter and just make me want to keep on writing more!**


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